Everyday I hear stories of people trying to "find" themselves & their passions. They keep looking outward as if it's something in a box that they'll find in a shop half-way across the world. There's nothing to find, just things to uncover. The problem is you're buried under the expectations and baggage from others. I Am My Past I am many things just as you are. We are a combination of our character, skills, experiences, accomplishments, etc of the PAST. It's a question with no finite answer because we are not fixed beings. We are able to take action and make a change. There is no perfect you, just the whole & complete version of you as we mentioned in last week's blog: You Are Enough AND Allowed To Change.
"...we are not fixed beings."
Uncovering Who You Are The way to uncover who you are is by letting go of all the baggage put on you by others. It's not about other people's thoughts, beliefs, actions, feelings, expectations, or struggles. How are you supposed to see yourself clearly if the view is cluttered with all of those things? This reminds me of watching My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic where the "Cutie Mark Crusaders" (3 fillies) try to find their "cutie mark" (a picture representation of their purpose permanently on their flank). They vow to use as much of their free time as possible to figure out their purpose & passion. They try many lists of things and never find their cutie mark until they look inside for the answer. First, I tell you this story because the show has such grown up concepts hiding behind the cute cartoon of colourful ponies. (There's a huge following of Bronies & Pegasisters which are grownups who love the show. Google it. They even did a documentary about them!) Second, don't we do the same thing on our entrepreneurial journey? We try a bunch of business opportunities, most of which are unsuccessful because they're just not for us right now.
"Secondly, don't we do the same thing on our entrepreneurial journey?"
Who You WANT To Be
The quest to uncover who we are started with unburdening yourself of the weight of others. Now it's time to get to know the real you even more by practicing who you want to be. Whether you're right or wrong about your core self, you will learn along the way. Did you think your main motivation at work was money and found out it's helping people have a voice? Did you think you're meant to be a conference speaker but just get too drained by big crowds? It's all okay! Personality The experience of going after your intention will still guide you in the right direction. You will always be you. Your core pretty much stays the same, but how you express it may change. Need a good place to start? Try taking a professional personality test! There are many great ones out there but my favourite at the moment is 16 Personalities. It's based on both the Jung and Myers Briggs models. (No, I'm not affiliated with them.) Personally, I am an ENFJ. It means Extroverted, iNtuitive, Feeling, Judging. It represents my mind, energy, nature and tactics. Reading through the detailed descriptions, it was very accurate. When I joined a community for my personality type on social media, I finally found people who understand me. Wow, was it nice.
Purpose Getting to know who you were helps you heal, and create who you want to be. Purpose is the the reason WHY you do whatever it is you do. You do many things and will have a few different core whys. Again, you don't find your purpose, it's already within you.
"Purpose is the the reason WHY you do whatever it is you do."
Whys are based on our core values. When we honour those values, we feel energized, balanced, driven, and satisfied. Honouring them again and again creates a pattern and therefore a new path which can lead to your desires.
What is it you desire?
What is the reason you put effort into the things you do?
Where do you happily spend most of your time?
What would you do if you had everything to help you succeed?
What would the everyday look like if the biggest struggle you had was resolved?
These are the types of inner questions that uncover what you already know.
Practice
Here are a few things you may want to practice: - acknowledging that thoughts aren't facts, yours nor other people's. - saying "no" to efforts that bring you no value. You define it's value. - deciphering expectation from intention. - letting go of your own expectations but keeping an intention. - honouring your core values by practicing them everyday. Take note of how your thoughts, feelings, actions, and even beliefs will shift. Get to know the patterns of situations and circumstances. Notice how you used to react to what is going on vs how you're responding to the situation. This self-awareness will play a big role in helping you answer the question of "Who Am I?" Which personality type are you? Which framework did you use?
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Learn, Love, and keep your Momentum,
Laura Lake <3