Does practice really make perfect? Not really, but what it does do is increase our chances of doing things consistently well! Practicing is how we create mental ruts, routines, and more automatic responses. We no longer need to put so much effort into focusing on all the repeating parts, that we can focus on putting it all together well.
Why Create Habits
We create habits so we save energy, reduce the load on conscious thinking, and can more easily predict situations & experiences. We crave the idea of control as it gives us a feeling of increased safety.
Habits mean I can think less about the routine itself and more about how to get the most out of my efforts. It's much more pleasant to focus on the intention of the practice than of whether or not you're doing it right.
It's much more pleasant to focus on the intention of the practice than of whether or not you're doing it right.
Mindfulness is one of those practices.
Many people place expectations of relaxation on their mindfulness practice and get hung up on if they're breathing or sitting right. Keeping an intention of staying present without judgement helps you let go of thoughts that do arise. As you practice observing only, you can again free up space in your conscious mind.
How Habits Work
According to Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business, there are 3 main sections to a habit:
1. Cue
2. Routine 3. Reward
The cue is the thing that sets the routine in motion. It's something you experience with your senses, like the seeing the time on the clock, hearing someone's voice, feeling an uncomfortable emotion, or even drinking your morning beverage.
Your brain doesn't see these routines as good or bad, so you need to choose your own behaviour.
The routine is the set of actions you take based on the cue you received. You determine these by past experience and practice. Your brain doesn't see these routines as good or bad, so you need to choose your own behaviour. Examples of routines would be reaching for food, using your phone, or saying positive/negative things to yourself.
The reward is the pleasure you feel when you completed the routine. It could be intrinsic (inside of yourself) like pride or joy, or extrinsic (outside of yourself) like money or a new job but it always relates to a feeling you wanted.
What Habits Actually Do
Habits are part of the structure to our day. They reduce the need for willpower, the amount of decisions we need to make, and the engagement in busy work. (How Habits Help You Make Decisions - Thrive Global)
Habits handle the repeated thoughts and actions so we can consciously handle the present moment nuances, or even issues that may arise. It takes great effort to handle many thoughts at once, but when repeated thoughts or actions become habit, they become much easier. Imagine if you had to think about every aspect of riding a bike like you used to. Imagine having to think about where each letter is on the keyboard.
Imagine reading all the directions. Every. Single. Time...(NOOOOOO!!!!)
How to Change Habits
So, you've identified patterns your not a fan of. Good for you, we all have some. Now how do you go about changing a habit?
You change a habit by taking it one piece at a time.
You change a habit by taking it one piece at a time.
Charles Duhigg suggests keeping your same cue and reward, but changing the routine. Once the routine is changed, then you can start to change the reward or cue.
For example, if you get up in the morning and the first thing you do is reach for your phone, try replacing it with a glass of water & a book/journal, but keep your phone much further away. The cue of waking up is the same, the reward of entertainment/connection is the same. Now you're establishing healthier habits that set the tone for the day.
The Hard Part
Sometimes the hard part is figuring out what your cue or reward is! This is where a notebook of some sort comes in handy.
Think about a habit you're trying to change. Whenever you catch yourself in it, write down what was going on before you started the behaviour as well as how you felt. Once you finish the routine, write how you feel afterwards. After a few sessions of writing it down, see if you find any patterns.
Sometimes the hard part is figuring out what your cue or reward is!
Think you have a pattern? Test it out. If it's the cue you're testing, keep the routine and reward the same. If it's the reward you're trying to understand, then keep the cue and routine as is. Observe what happens when you switch either out for something you believe gives you the same result.
Success
One's chances of success can depend on a lot of things. Clarity & direction are two very important aspects as they are elevated by the types of habits we have. Next week we'll discuss the role of habits on both personal and professional success. How do habits affect YOUR life? Share your best & worst habits by using the hashtag #BEDMASlife.
Learn, Love, and keep your Momentum,
Laura Lake <3